02.28.05
Posted in Old Rantings at 12:17 am by mdellinger
Why is it that when I get around all my friends and we start drinking that I start to neglect the one person that I really care about the most? I don’t know if it’s because I don’t see my friends as much as I see her so I feel like I have to treat them better or what the deal is. I have to stop thinking that I can please everybody and just consider her feelings more when we’re hanging out with everyone.
I tell her all the time that she’s the greatest thing in the world, which I truly believe, but then when we go out in a crowd I make her feel like crap sometimes. I need to treat her the same way I always try to treat her and not leave her feeling awful like I can tend to do unintentionally.
We really do get along great and I think we’re perfect for each other. We really do relate on so many levels that it’s scary sometimes. I know that I’ve found what love is with her.
On another note, (and another bad pun) I’ve started playing guitar a lot more lately and I really want to keep that up. I’ve known so many people that have been playing for the longest time and were really good and then they just gave up playing altogether. I don’t want to become one of those people. In the words of Van Halen, I gotta finish what I started.
I want to do everything I can to the best of my potential and I’m willing to put in the time and the effort to do that. But sometimes I realize that I have to control myself and my actions to think about others first. And while I may step on some toes I have to think about the people that really matter first.
Permalink
02.05.05
Posted in Old Rantings at 1:56 am by mdellinger
Whitney and I have just celebrated our 7th anniversary together. It seems so wierd to think about that we’ve been together for seven years. It just doesn’t seem like it’s been that long. Seem like just yesterday I was pulling into her driveway in my big pink van (I’ll have to find pictures) and the next thing I know (well not exactly the next thing, that time apart was pretty long) we’ve got own place and we’re living together (in sin some would say.
But I have to say it has been the best seven years of my life. And I feel like we’re even closer now than we were back then.
Tonight we went out on a date and had a great time together, just like we always do. We went to Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse in Buckhead, which I have to say was pretty good, but damn expensive. I’m not so worried about it now that we’re both making money, but I’m glad we only do that as a once in a while thing. Just looking around that place you could tell that we were the youngest ones there. But it was alright we didn’t care…as long as we were getting the treatment like everybody else it didn’t matter.
I’m happier right now than I’ve been in a long time. I’ve got a ton on my mind, and a lot to deal with, but it’s not really phasing me as much. It’s nice to have somewhere there that you can just talk to.
Permalink
02.01.05
Posted in Old Rantings at 4:15 am by mdellinger
It’s coming up on Whitney and I’s seventh anniversary tomorrow. Now I know that’s a really long time (and definitely a lot longer than any relationship I’ve ever been in) but I still haven’t put a ring on her finger, and I’m sure she’s starting to chomp at the bit for it.
I’ve been feeling a little bit of regret for going off and buying this expensive computer, when I haven’t even bought her a ring yet. That’s definitely next on my list of big purchases.
I’m not scared that she’s going to leave me or anything, but I think I’ve waited long enough, and I’ve put her through waiting too long now. The only thing is now I’ll have to pay off this computer and then go into even more debt. I’m just hoping that I can’t get enough work on the side to pay it off a little more quickly, and I can start making payments for a ring.
I know my family is ready for a wedding too. I don’t want to just do if for them, cause it’s been so long. I want to do it when both of us are ready to do it….But I do want to do it while most of my family is still around to see it.
It seems like now I have less time than I’ve ever had in my life, and it all goes by so quick. I mean I go about my every day to day life (which isn’t like most people’s day in/day out schedule) and then next thing I know another season has passed.
Well I hope that she isn’t as concerned about getting I ring as I think she is…cause really what I want more than anything is for her to be happy. I’ll just have the rest of my life to show that to her.
Permalink